Ugh okay. The grief and emotional intensity of everything that has happened since late last week is really starting to actually hit me.

I’ve been in “community mom” mode since before the tragedy or TDOR. Taking care of people, having a strong face, helping my community feel safe.

And i don’t think I’ve let myself feel anything since it started, and its starting to hit me today….

Fuck and i have at least one more thing that i have to do like this today. I have at least one more thing to get through. And its going to be so intense and hard.

Sometimes, yes, queer organizing can be lots of fun. I cherish my workdays wherein I get to be surrounded by amazing queer people. I look forward to every way that I will find to become further in community with people through organizing.

But goddamn. It’s also a lot of tears.

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