rant about conservatives 

Lmao i love it when my conservative coworkers try and complain to me about shit. like “oh those GREEN WINDMILLS in texas arent so good now that it’s frozen!”
When i told her the gas pipelines are also frozen she didn’t even acknowledge me. We are not the same, stop talking to me like we will agree on anything

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I know it’s not Friday but here are some pictures of Dickinsonia aka the Flattest Fuck

These babies lived 550 million years ago and for a while we weren’t sure it was even an animal because it’s just a big splat


Breakfast: banana, a slice of brisket, and a forgotten heel of bread. Coffee with a splash of cream bc it’s the weekend

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"wait i thought this was a gender reveal???"
me, doing doughnuts in a tractor: no it's a john deere reveal you dummy

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I CAN’T 😂😂😂 I left myself a note at work that just says
“-TOMORROW”, No idea what it means

you guuyes wanna see my rendition of the 👁👄👁 emoji thing?


Love getting to hear my coworkers be homophobic about Jojo Siwa across the store. I gotta get outta this state


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yes, every character will be trans.
No, none of them will be white.

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My life calling is to write B-rated movie scripts...
that’s being generous, is there a C rating?

brb, gonna make a fake movie poster called for a fake movie called “The Keeper” and it’s about a bee-pocalypse and the Main Character that will save us all

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bees in the workplace 

“On the main drag of sunny Santa Barbara, California, four blocks from the Pacific Ocean, sits the three-story headquarters of Invoca, an artificial-intelligence software company. Like many offices, the building has been empty since March, when Invoca sent employees home to shelter from Covid-19.

Well, not quite empty.

For amidst the building’s abandoned desks and silent phones, 20,000 honey bees were hard at work, building a hive filled with 10 gallons’ worth of honey, beeswax, and pollen, as Invoca’s leadership learned in January, much to their surprise.

‘We were talking a lot as an executive team about how and when to bring people back to the office and how to make sure it’s safe,’ says Dee Anna McPherson, Invoca’s chief marketing officer. ‘It never occurred to me to think of bees.’

It never does.”


is coming back (tentatively) on 2/22!!!!! Get ready for me to be INCREDIBLY ANNOYING ABOUT A DUMB GAME

sometimes you just gotta drive somewhere far in the middle of the night and sleep at a rest stop in ur car bc at your core you are dramatic

shoutout to the pharmacy tech that specifically used they/them pronouns when i went to go pick up my first ever dose of

breakup whining 

wow i didnt realize that Hayloft by Mother Mother would ever make me cry so much

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Opening my skull and pouring Grape Nuts inside to gain extra power

Oh god my decisions... are up to me????? who put me in charge??

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